Three Stages of Life!
There is a lot written about life and it’s ways in the past. Frankly I don’t know how many people benefit out of reading it, nonetheless here I am to make
an attempt at writing something which I firmly believe in and want people to use it.
In my journey of what can be described as routine at the same time adventurous and full of changes, I figured out that these three phases. No matter what you do, how much you mess up your grades in school, however bad your work place is, however bad your parties are in your teens, however rough your parents are with you in your adolescence, being at a stage at the right time is the most important thing and I can not stress this more — It does not matter then what you do in that stage, there will be still chances of your surviving and having a near perfect life in spite of your screw ups!
Stage 1: Dependence — From when you are born till you are 18 or so, you are dependent on you parents or your guardians for almost everything, and it’s ok or rather important to be that way, you need to learn humility, taking favours from others this helps you be grounded, teaches you thanking others, makes you feel that you are not self sufficient and rather need the ecosystem to help you grow. At this stage you are not mature enough to take your decisions, you need guidance from someone sane, as ego can seep in real quick at this stage and you end up being a snob for the rest of your times, so the responsibility is all on your parents (of course other factors also matter, but main role to play is with the parents) to shape you well! Decisions taken at this stage will be very critical, so having someone to show you the right path is a privilege, opportunity which you should grab.
Stage 2: Independence — After 18, it is mandatory that you transit form being dependent to being independent, live your dreams, realise your potential, do something of your own, go fly, live your life, earn, be useful, be successful, be heard, be wanted, be someone, be YOU! In short — make your life. These are the most crucial years that will, in most of the cases, decide the fate of your life, whether financial, social or mental well being. Not achieving something in these years is still acceptable; being stuck at the dependent stage is suicidal, you will be needy for the rest of your life. Don’t get me wrong when I say independent, I don’t mean financial independence, which can come later, but what I mean here is that you should be taking your own decisions, working towards a goal in life, put all your efforts, do your own laundry, arrange your own meals, have your own people to socialize. This is a stage where normally a school kid is supposed to go to college, learn to stay away from parents, study, get good grades, choose your friends, make your own mistakes, get out of your parent’s nest & experience life!
Interdependence — After 24–26, you should have someone to go back to, after a busy, fulfilling, satisfying day. Or else, trust me you will turn into a self-centered, self-consumed egoist, who cares for no one but self. It is very important that at right time you start thinking about someone else while making decisions, rather than be just concerned just about your self. I believe that interdependence has the key to everything. Imagine, if your 30, and have no one in life, you must have become so successful by now, even if not successful, you are self sufficient emotionally and practically. You have your own ways of living, dealing with stuff, you want things your way — pretty much like “my way or highway”. After this, liking someone adjusting with that person becomes very difficult. If you meet someone at a young age , you grow together, you get moulded in a way to fit with that person — and it’s not always changing yourself but rather growing into someone who is more compatible with your partner. With time, you become more independent, it becomes very difficult to make space for someone else with your set of arrangements, you will have to make more adjustments at a later stage.